I just want to grow old with you, Buddy :(

Okay, yesterday, I went to my friend's Despedida party. I'll miss her so much :( Hmm. So that evening, we had so much fun that we didn't notice the time any more. As a matter of fact, I went home at 11:30pm. Hmm. It was fine with my Mom 'cause I explained that Kyla is one of my dearest friend that surely I'll miss so much and I'll treasure too. So, when I got home, I immediately took a bath and texted my friends if they're still awake. So I think 3 of them were. So there, I fell asleep when I was waiting for Suy's reply. Haha. Sorry Suy :)) Hmm. 9 o'clock in the morning, my Sister was bothering my sleep and kept on saying " Uy, patay na si Sleepy. Kanina pa 'di gumagalaw e." Hmm. Sleepy is our dog. She has been with us since I was 5. So, as of 2008, she is 70 y/o 'cause in a dog's life, our 1 year is equivalent to 7 years to them. That's why she is 70 now. I was shocked when I heard that. At first, I didn't believe my Sister 'cause usually, she's saying things that would just wake me up because if there's no classes, I always wake up at 12noon. But because of my deep concern for Sleepy, I hurriedly got up and went to where she is. And when I saw her, she's not moving at all and her eyes were still open but no matter how I touch her head, she doesn't blink. So my eyes began to be filled up with tears. But at first I really don't want to cry 'cause my Sister's looking at me. But when I held Sleepy's hand, it was so cold; I didn't know what to do then that my eyes began to cry. I shouted for my Mom and asked her what did they fed her. My mouth kept on saying "Sleepy, wake up. Sleepy! Sleepy!" I felt that I've lost a friend, a very very loyal friend. You know what, I remember that times when I used to talk to Sleepy whenever I have problems. And during those times, she kept on smiling at me and she lies down on my feet. She's so sweet that I think she can sense whenever you're sad. She's more than a dog for me. I never thought this is her day. I always hug her at times whenever I'm at home alone. I feed her every summer and weekends. I give her a bath twice a month. Supposedly, I'm going to give her a bath today but I guess I'm too late that God said He'll give Sleepy a bath in heaven. I was crying for an hour. When our carpenter arrived, he asked me why am I crying. I couldn't answer because up to now I can't believe she's gone. My mom talked to our carpenter and asked him if he can bury Sleepy into our backyard. I heard their conversation, so I interrupted that "Wag muna ngayon, gusto ko pa sya makita." My Kuya got up from bed 'cause he can sense my crying. He went where I was and asked me what happened. I said, "Hindi na gumagalaw si Sleepy. Diba tulog lang sya? Magigising din sya." I looked at my brother's eyes and I noticed that he's teary eyed too. He went to the Sala where my Mom was and my mom said "Masigla pa sya kagabi. Nakikipaglaro pa nga e. BJ, pwede mo ba syang ilibing?" My Kuya responded "Ayoko Ma, di ko kayang makita kaya nga ako pumasok e. Sa lahat ng aso natin, iba yan. Di ko kayang ilibing yan nang ganyanan." When I heard Kuya's words, I was totally speechless and I cried even more. So after 30minutes. My mom decided to bury Sleepy 'cause I won't stop crying. So our carpenter dig some space in our backyard. I said to him "Mang Jun, laliman mo ng konti a?" So he did. And when he carried Sleepy, we noticed her private organ bleeding, we were shocked. And we also noticed her tummy got big and hard. So our carpenter guessed that she's pregnant; the puppies died first inside her tummy that causes to spoil her body. Up to now, I can't still believe she's gone now. At 12noon a while ago, it’s time for me to feed our dogs. We have 2 dogs, but now Sleepy’s gone, we only have one. But we do still have the “plate” where Sleepy used to eat. So when I grabbed those “plates”, tears fell down from my eyes because I couldn’t help miss Sleepy. I can’t imagine how it’ll be without her: a friend, a dog, a sister, a buddy, a shoulder to lean on, a bear to hug, a pet to feed, a mom to bark and save you from enemies, a playmate to place a smile in your face, a partner to complete your life, a clown during New year, a child to be cleaned up, an everything that means to me A LOT. She had been with me for a long time. I’m her closest friend in our house. I couldn’t go to a party later on because I can’t paint a smile on my face. I can’t fake my smiles because I’ve lost someone. I don’t even know how to start my day tomorrow. My only wish for this day and forever that she’ll be on heaven safe and sound and she’ll continue to be with me throughout my life just beside me to give me strength and be always a shoulder to have and a bear to hug. I’ll miss you a lot Sleepy! You know you’re more than a dog to me :) I LOVE YOU. See you some day! I want you to be the first one to welcome me in heaven. I love you, my bear! Take care wherever you are. I'll miss your smell and your bark at night! Eat well, ha? Stay fat:) Keep those fur soft and clean always. Be with me in my dreams. I love you so much :(

I know its unusual to cry for a dog. But I've told you, I never did consider her as a dog. She's part of our family :) Just think about if you were on my shoes. Oh well, I can't help but cry while typing this entry. I'm already missing her. I want to hug her :(

Ja